The Space Between Words

Written 11 Nov 2021

Silence, stillness and spaciousness have become incredibly important aspects in my life and within my self.

They have also become core elements of what I encourage my clients to focus on for themselves.

The past few days Ive been reflecting on this topic..

I remembered something someone had asked me who had just listened to a Podcast episode of Your Sacred Sovereign Self - Why do you leave a lot of gaps where you're not speaking?

I said to him that it wasn’t actually on purpose to leave those gaps but ive learnt not to fill in the space when there are not any words coming forth. I told him that the space between the words is just as important as the words themselves and its ok if it feels a bit uncomfortable to listen to, alot can happen within those spaces. 

Ill share a little something with you that might surprise you - before I sit down to record an episode I go COMPLETELY BLANK every time! I know the topic I would like to talk about and share but if I even try to avoid the “blank” and think about or plan what to say, my head is just a scrambled mess of words that do not go together!

The same thing happens before each session or group session.

So.. I have learnt to be with the emptiness, the spaciousness and the silence and not try to change it… knowing and trusting that whatever needs to be spoken will come forth when it needs to.

This often comes with a procrastination to even sit down to do a podcast episode because Ill tell myself that I don't even know what Im going to F ing say! Once I allow that doubt and fear to fall, Ill step into action and record whatever is there to be expressed. (this is why Its been a slow start on the podcast front lol)

This has also taken form in my relationships. I no longer fill in or try to "fix or change" the silent spaces.

If there isn't anything naturally arising to be spoken, I simply do not use words. My presence, my love and my listening is still fully there but I no longer have any desire within me to step into an old pattern of talking for the sake of talking. Talking to make others feel more comfortable, over talking a subject or experience, pulling it apart, dissecting, analysing and justifying it to myself and another. I also no longer hold the desire to please another with giving them the words I feel they may want to hear.There are many Identities entangled within these patterns that are falling away.

It is the spaciousness, stillness and the silence that allows ourselves and the other to be fully present with what is going on within. 

To feel and to know what their own internal instructions are informing them of. To feel and to know what is arising in that now moment for and within themselves from the interactions and experiences they are having.

Have you noticed how much effort it takes to fill in the spaces? Have you also noticed how uncomfortable it is to NOT fill in the spaces?

When we are so used to outside noise, outside information and filling any space within with avoidance behaviour/people/things/noise, it gets super uncomfortable when we stop. 

We are left with what is really there to be acknowledged, what is arising on the inside and what is truly there for us in our own personal inner world.

We can spend our whole lives avoiding that uncomfortableness.

Or we can understand that the uncomfortableness is necessary and always accompanies change, inner alchemy and transformation. All of which leads to the embodiment of more of our true self.

Once we lean into and trust the uncomfortableness we can then honour the silence and spaciousness and be a supportive part of the process rather than resisting and avoiding it.

I speak alot about listening and only ever acting from our own inner instructions, even if it goes against logic, usual ways and patterns of behaviour (especially if it goes against these ;)) because our inner instructions are born out of our own connection to the purity of who we are. They are coming from the purist form of self without the conditioning/programing/patterns/ past experiences and traumas.

It is in the silence and the stillness that we most clearly hear and know our own self informing us. from the inside out - not the outside in.

Today I encourage you to embrace the stillness, the silence and the spaces between the words, the noise and the interactions.

You will meet more of your self here.

You will meet more clarity here.

You will meet more connection & aliveness here.

You will also dance with more contentment, love, fulfilment and grace in your everyday moments.